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Insanely Inane Thoughts

If fate doesn't make you laugh, you just don't get the joke.

It Rained That Day

He spat on the road and cursed the weather. The clouds spat back and tried to drench him furthermore. Dirty water slushed past his legs and his own spit was brought back to him as he stood under the confines of the flooded bus stop.

He looked at his watch and cursed somemore. He was running late for the party.

Where is the goddamn bus? he shrieked, startling the young man standing next to him. He moved away a little from the crazed Ramirez who glared at the retreating stranger and spat on the road again.

Stop spitting, said the young man.

What did you say, you little smurfrat!

I said stop spitting.

Ramirez took a step towards the young man and spat on the road again. The clouds thundered and the rain intensified. The young man shouted in anger and threatened to poke Ramirez with the wet umbrella.

Even if a speck of water falls on my shirt from your umbrella, I'll have you by your skin! growled Ramirez.

The young man took a step towards Ramirez with the umbrella pointed towards him and spat near Ramirez's foot.

How does that feel, old man? he snarled.

Ramirez stared at the spittle which swirled in the water and then stuck to Ramirez's shoes. Enraged, he charged at the young man. who threw his umbrella to the side and took up a Jet Li posture.

Come on! he shouted.

Ramirez stopped dead in his tracks and then cursed the young man vilely. If it hadn't been for my new shirt, I would have socked the daylights out of you, sissy boy!

Well, if it hadn't been for my new shirt too, I would have socked you back, you mummified excuse for a man! Besides, why would an old man like you care for a shirt? You look like you might drop dead anytime now and if you did, your shirt would end up getting wet!

This shirt's a special one, assclown! It's my grandson's first birthday gift to me.

The rain fell even harder.

It's my birthday today too! exclaimed the wonderstruck young man. This shirt's the first one given to me by my wife.

Ramirez softened a little and smiled. Happy birthday, young man.

Thank you and happy birthday to you too, sir.

Ramirez smiled and shook his head. How nearly he had gotten into a fight and how it might have spoiled his shirt.

The young man was thinking along the same lines when the bus drove past them at full speed, drenching the two of them completely.
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