Notes From A Single Guy
If there is a bigger crime than being a nice guy, it's being a funny, nice guy.I think I'm either funny or nice because when I make fun, I am not such a nice guy.
But girls feel otherwise.
I try to rectify this misconception as amicably as I could.The other day, a girlfriend of mine was telling me about how she thinks that sex and anything related to sex was such a pain in the ass.I told her as politely as I could that if she thinks that sex is a pain in the ass then most often than not she is doing it the wrong way.She burst out laughing and tells me how funny I am.Here I am, making fun of her intellectual capabilties on the subject of sex and she brands me as a "funny" guy.There are days when I just nod along, barely listening to the girls who yap away till Rip Van Winkle gets up.On such days, they tell me what a nice guy I am.Most often than not, I think that girls think of nice guys as an emotional pad.Nice, funny guys are pads with wings.
Unlike Rajesh , who has been likened to a younger brother who also looks like a dog, I haven't been compared to either.However, I have had some girls tell me that I remind them of a bunny.Bunnies, by nature, are extremely sexual and if you think of the Energizer Bunny, then that would mean that I could go on and on and on.Well then, here is a guy who seems to be nice, funny and has been told indirectly that he is a sex god.
But I'm still single.I don't want it to sound as if I'm complaining but there is only so much your hand can take.
Being a nice, funny guy does get you girls.The catch being that they are already hitched with another guy.They come over to you and talk to you about all that is wrong with their guy and then go on to exclaim why he isn't like me."I'm still single", I say.They throw back their heads and laugh like there is no tomorrrow."This is why we like talking to you so much, you're so funnny".Hell yeah, I'm sooo fricking funny that I have tears coming out of my eyes.
Another common theme betwen all nice guys is how they much of trust they inspire from girls.In fact, all of us could start out a sisterhood together and no-one would find it funny.Women call you up and talk to you for hours at end about their latest crush; who's seeing whom; who isn't seeing whom( which includes you).This usually stretches late into the night and sets you up with the ideal time to talk dirty over the phone."So what are you wearing or should I ask what aren't you wearing?"."Almost nothing; why?"."Drape on something; you might catch a cold." She ends up laughing and I still retain my funny, nice guy reputation.
Many guys who know me also encourage their girls to meet up with me.One of the conversations I had with a dude, had him telling me how furious he got when his girl acted overtly friendly with another dude; but when she acted the same way with me, it's all fine.These are the days when I want to scream out: Hello, look at my groin.These are what people call testicles and this is what they call a weeny.When they work in synchrony, stuff happens (touch wood).
But there is nothing to be bitter about.I've made some real good girlfriends and when their boyfriends start dying one after the other under mysterious circumstances, not even God can stop me.
From being a nice, funny guy who is still single.
This account is purely fictitious; life swings my way too ;)
But girls feel otherwise.
I try to rectify this misconception as amicably as I could.The other day, a girlfriend of mine was telling me about how she thinks that sex and anything related to sex was such a pain in the ass.I told her as politely as I could that if she thinks that sex is a pain in the ass then most often than not she is doing it the wrong way.She burst out laughing and tells me how funny I am.Here I am, making fun of her intellectual capabilties on the subject of sex and she brands me as a "funny" guy.There are days when I just nod along, barely listening to the girls who yap away till Rip Van Winkle gets up.On such days, they tell me what a nice guy I am.Most often than not, I think that girls think of nice guys as an emotional pad.Nice, funny guys are pads with wings.
Unlike Rajesh , who has been likened to a younger brother who also looks like a dog, I haven't been compared to either.However, I have had some girls tell me that I remind them of a bunny.Bunnies, by nature, are extremely sexual and if you think of the Energizer Bunny, then that would mean that I could go on and on and on.Well then, here is a guy who seems to be nice, funny and has been told indirectly that he is a sex god.
But I'm still single.I don't want it to sound as if I'm complaining but there is only so much your hand can take.
Being a nice, funny guy does get you girls.The catch being that they are already hitched with another guy.They come over to you and talk to you about all that is wrong with their guy and then go on to exclaim why he isn't like me."I'm still single", I say.They throw back their heads and laugh like there is no tomorrrow."This is why we like talking to you so much, you're so funnny".Hell yeah, I'm sooo fricking funny that I have tears coming out of my eyes.
Another common theme betwen all nice guys is how they much of trust they inspire from girls.In fact, all of us could start out a sisterhood together and no-one would find it funny.Women call you up and talk to you for hours at end about their latest crush; who's seeing whom; who isn't seeing whom( which includes you).This usually stretches late into the night and sets you up with the ideal time to talk dirty over the phone."So what are you wearing or should I ask what aren't you wearing?"."Almost nothing; why?"."Drape on something; you might catch a cold." She ends up laughing and I still retain my funny, nice guy reputation.
Many guys who know me also encourage their girls to meet up with me.One of the conversations I had with a dude, had him telling me how furious he got when his girl acted overtly friendly with another dude; but when she acted the same way with me, it's all fine.These are the days when I want to scream out: Hello, look at my groin.These are what people call testicles and this is what they call a weeny.When they work in synchrony, stuff happens (touch wood).
But there is nothing to be bitter about.I've made some real good girlfriends and when their boyfriends start dying one after the other under mysterious circumstances, not even God can stop me.
From being a nice, funny guy who is still single.
This account is purely fictitious; life swings my way too ;)
This entry was posted
on Sunday, February 20, 2005 at 9:35 PM.
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