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Insanely Inane Thoughts

If fate doesn't make you laugh, you just don't get the joke.

Cruel Intentions

Jay and Deepti were happily married until now.Jay, being a man and a horny one at that, was always ready for some tomfoolery in the bedroom.Tonight was no such exception.

As soon as the lights were turned off by Deepti, Jay started getting a little comfortable.However, she hardly responded.Infact, just as Jay was getting into the mood, she turns towards Jay and tells him, "I'm not in that mood, honey.I just want to be held in your arms."

Jays winks at her and says, "That's exactly what I'm saying.All I want is that it be held in your loving fingers."

She looks at him coldly and says, "That's so typically like men.You just aren't aware of my emotional needs as a women.Period."

Jay was rather taken aback by this nasty turn of events.Realizing that he wasn't going to get any this night, he went to the bathroom; and slept as a contented man in twently minutes.

Over the next few days, things were more or less the same.This left him very frustrated.

Having just moved into a new house, there was still some shopping which had to be done.One day while they were out shopping, Deepti fell in love with an outrageously priced painting.She insisted that it matched with the decor of the living room and after much persistence, Jay told her to take it with her.Triumphant, Deepti was in no mood to relent.She spotted some exquisite Swaroski crystals which caugh her fancy.Jay told her to take that along as well.By now, Deepti was over the moon.She must have been thinking that Jay was one synapse away from insanity, but he didn't think she cared.

This was the closest Jay had seen Deepti come towards any sort of an excitement in the past few days and he thought it bordered on the verge of an orgasm.Deepti was flush with excitement when she told Jay that she was ready to head towards the check-out counter.Jay could hardly contain himself and blurted out, "But I don't feel like buying all this stuff now, honey.".

Her face became as pale as a ghost's and then he said, "All I wanted you to do was hold them."Just before she triggered off an intergalactic war, he added for good measure, "Maybe you aren't aware of my financial needs as a man."

Jay figures that he wouldn't be having sex till he turns 60.
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