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Insanely Inane Thoughts

If fate doesn't make you laugh, you just don't get the joke.

Skipping School

"Not so easily," her voice thunders from within the confines of the laboratory.

Ashish's march into the laboratory is cut short right by the doorway.He stands still and looks inquiringly at the professor who had the gall to deny him entry into the laboratory.The class watches silently as the professor glares at Ashish with distaste.

In an odd twist of fate, her voice was everything that she wasn't.

She has an ill-fitting frame which hides the better part of her face behind, what seems to the most of us, a telescope.Her eyes, which are no more than slits, appear as big as fog lights as they blink through her glasses.Her hair is a complete mess and reminds us of a housefly with a toupee.Placed strategically beneath her frame, her nose seems to be on a perpetual launch sequence threatening to blast off in the thermosphere.Her lips shows no signs of life and are forever aligned parallel to the ground while adding further contrast with her nose.

Her neck juts out vertically and can give any giraffe in the zoo a run for his money.Whenever she is busy looking down at something and you startle her with words, her neck jumps out at you like a jack in the box.Her built is so slight that sometimes it is easy to mistake her for a badly tended bonsia plant from a distance.An aberration, in an otherwise unspectacular frame, is the slight padding she has built up along her stomach which probably acts as an anchor to help her stay grounded.

She stands at 5'2" and that is when she isn't wearing stilts.It would be easy to miss her in a room because of her demeanor, which is as fiery as an angry Gandhian.

And yet she has a voice which gives her that edge; not unlike the edge an amoeba with a boombox might command from an evolutioanry biologist.

"Excuse me, Ma'am?"

"Not so easily, young man," her voice booms out at Ashish.

"Not so easily as in, Ma'am?"

"You think you can skip classes in the morning and then turn up for practicals in the afternoon, eh?"

It was true.Ashish had been one of the lucky ones who had missed the morning session which had been as intellectaully stimulating as watching George Bush tackle calculus or trying to spell out nuclear.Cutting classes is frowned upon; much like farting during a presentation is frowned upon.

Ashish shifts his weight while trying to come up with a perfect answer.

"Well, what do you have to say for yourself, young man?".Boom boom.

"But ma'am, I only skipped your class in the morning." Saying this, he makes his way confidently into the laboratory while Bomsai plant looks on at him; apparently at a loss for words.

Well, if you can't beat them then just confuse them; usually with smart statements but sometimes stupidity helps you too.
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